Calm - Personal Practice

It's amazing how time flies when you are working on something you feel passion for!

I've been working on a few projects that are dear to my heart for over a year and a half.  In this time I've taken many breaks from the main project, but it's always on my mind.

In recent months I have been digging a little deeper into the project, but here and there I've let myself get overwhelmed by my vision.  It's amazing how I can talk myself into multiple paths with one simple objective.

Then a few weeks back I buckled down and put a plan together.  The great thing about this plan is that I'm holding myself accountable by following the methodology of the project I'm working on.    

I know, based on reflection, that when I get into a project my standard approach is to devote myself completely to the project.  This is good and bad.

It's good that time flies and I feel a sense of accomplishment.

It's bad that I get so involved that I forget to be in the moment.  I start to think of the project in terms of perfection.

If interrupted I get anxious because I want to be working on the project.

If I get too close to a date in my plan that I need to deliver on, I feel pressure.

My world starts to get a bit chaotic as I push toward the future.

While reflecting I found myself thinking back to something I use to say years ago "patience is a virtue, of which I have none".  I use to think that was funny to say.  Now, I don't think it's so funny.  

Now when I catch myself thinking of that old saying, I'll practice breathing.  

I'll remind myself that the joy of life and of the project is in each moment.  I'll tell myself I can't predict exactly how things will turn out.  

If my project goes to plan it will evolve and get better and better over time, but I can't do it all on my own and I won't be perfect.

So I pat myself on my back for being self aware, but realize I still have a lot of practice to do.

I need to practice:

* Taking breaks and looking around me

* Remembering that nothing is perfect, least of all me.

* Breathing and staying calm 

I know I should be patient and calm as I practice.

But, can I be?

Back to practice to see!