A White Lie - Personal Practice

What have I got to loose?  This is the thought that has been coming to mind for me often lately.  When faced with a challenge or feeling, I’ve thought to myself; what have I got to loose?

I have lost something.  I’ve found that I’ve lost control. 

When I say “control”, I mean the type of control in which you feel you can not function unless you have every moment pre-planned, the type of control in which you anticipate the whole day before you get out of bed in the morning and if there is a variance in the plan you feel stressed. 

With this, my practice has been to be open to new experiences and emotions.  I’ve let myself be open, sharing, and communicative.  In doing so I’ve simply lost a lot of my control.

The interesting thing is I’ve had new experiences and feelings I haven’t had or felt before.  I’ve found that I’m excited and scared.  Both of which are emotions I have not let myself feel in a long time.

My days are not as scheduled and structured.  I don’t feel as stressed with the lack of structure.

I’m letting myself live.  

All this by simply stating to myself; what have I got to loose?

I’m the type of person who normally would wait for something good to come to me in a relationship instead of taking a chance and put myself out there.  Which in my thought process of “what have I got to loose?” got me to thinking about those who do take the chance and risk feeling silly or being rejected.  I then thought to myself; why not?  I’ll ask the questions I want answers to.  What’s the worst that could happen?  I don’t get the answer I want?  

What a rewarding experience it is to be risky with your emotions!

However, I can honestly say the fear can be so emotionally shaking as well.  But, what a wonderful way to live!  With emotion and feelings and adventure in the unknown!

I highly recommend asking yourself “what have I got to loose?” and jumping with both feet in to an experience

The rewards, even if you come out on the other end a little battered and bruised, you embraced the journey and lived!

A White Lie - Yoga Lesson

Do you find yourself spending energy and time on maintenance of a lie?

Why?

Let it go.  Even if you find you need to tell the truth to let it go.

Why Not?

Think of all the time and energy you will have for new, exciting, and positive things in your life with the absence of this lie.

Think of all the rest you will get with this worry eliminated from you life.

Let it go.

Life Experience - Personal Practice

I notice that I have a tendency to let the priorities of the life I’m supposed to lead take over my life.  

As I evaluate the “supposed to” part of this I have to ask myself, do I want to live my life in a “supposed to” way?

The answer came back with an emphatic “NO”!

I’m grateful for the life I’ve led and the experiences I’ve had, I like me and the person I am.  There is value in the lessons I learned when following the “supposed to” mentality.  

It taught me what I do and do not want for my life.

It brought me to a place where I asked difficult questions of myself, and had to be honest in my answers.

When I think of “priorities” now, I ask myself if this is truly a priority to me, or do I feel like it “should” be a priority to me.

If the answer comes back as “should” I know that it’s not really me who feels it’s a priority.  It’s external.  The use of the word “should” is always a clear indicator to me that it may not really be important in the larger scheme of things for my journey.

My practice is to actually place priority where it belongs, and on the experiences that will enrich my life and offer the most personal satisfaction in my journey.

This is not easy as I find myself thinking about what I “should” do often and I have guilt associated to the “should”.

In time and with practice it will get easier to see the “should” for what it truly is; a self defeating attempt to live life in a way that is without truth.

I will place priority where it belongs!

Life Experience - Yoga Lesson

Ever notice how interesting another person’s life may seem?

How the experience another person brings to a situation or group can leave you envious and wondering why you haven’t done what they have?

Why focus on the life experience of another person?

Why not live in your own moment and appreciate the life experience you have and bring to any situation?

If you want to embrace a new experience tell yourself that you are going to do it and then do it!

Where can you add to your life experience by doing?

Say to yourself you are going to do something you have wanted and then do it!

If a Door Closes-Another Opens - Personal Practice

I have spent significant time in my life recreating a past that will not be changed.

I’ve gone back and tried to relive moments to force a different outcome.

I kept getting the same result.  

It took me awhile to realize why.  

I was living constantly in my past.  I was recreating it each moment of the now.  My anticipation for the future revolved around fixing the past.

This was hard to let go of.  It’s taken a lot of practice, self awareness, and pain to get through the moments when all I wanted to do was go back.

I kept repeating to myself “I can’t go back, my life is this moment”.  

It took a lot longer than I thought it would to get through this trend I had of trying to fix my past.

Along with this pattern of trying to fix my past, I kept thinking I’ll be happy if I achieve “this or that”.  

The “this or that” kept changing as I inserted “this or that” into my recreation of the past.  I kept thinking the future will be better if I can fix the past and I’ll insert this new “this or that” into the scenario to make it work.

I’d think that “once I fix this and mold it just a little differently to eliminate the bad parts I’ll be happy”.

What a realization it was to realize what I was doing.  How enlightening it is when I catch myself now trying to fix my future by recreating my past.

I practice letting each moment and experience be as it is, and it’s hard.

I want to compare and cross relate experiences and people.  I know I can not.  

I practice being in the moment and recognizing how unique and special it is.

When I do not let the moment be unique, I run the risk of ruining something special.

I will let each moment be unique and special!

If a Door Closes-Another Opens - Yoga Lesson

How easy it is to spend our time dwelling on the past of fantasizing about the future.

To spend valuable time thinking about all that we did not say and do or anticipate that perfect outcome.

How much more enriching will the moment you are in be if you can accept your past and let it go?

If you take a positive step toward the future you envision for yourself in this moment, will you reach the outcome you desire?

Why not be in this moment and make it all that it can be?

Live in the Now!

Monotony - Personal Practice

Routine is something I’m very familiar with.  Most of my life has been run by routine.  

I tend to find it in everything I do and then attach myself to the routines.  I find them very comforting and at time enjoyable.

When I practice something so much that it becomes a routine, I find reward in knowing the routine and becoming at times an expert in the routine so I can share it with others.

Routine has also caused me heartache, as there have been many times I’ve let routine rule me.  Routine became so important that I would forgo a new challenge or opportunity for fear of missing out on the routines of my life.

Routines have taken such a chunk of time in each day of my life that I had little time left for any enjoyment.  The need to accomplish the routines left me stressed and tired.

I now know this about myself.  I know that I can let routine rule me in both good and bad.  I know that I can go to the extremes with routine.

My challenge to myself is to recognize when I feel so compelled to follow a routine that I will sacrifice other desires I have for myself in life.

So I made a “small” list of other desires I have for myself.  I prioritized this list.  I’ve forced myself to recognize when an opportunity arises that could lead me down a path of reaching a desire on the list.  Then I take the opportunity and forgo the routines of my life.  

This is not an easy task.  

The rewards are not without fear, but I remind myself when I have a fearful emotion that I’m challenging myself and breaking the monotony of my life and all its routines.  That I’m reaching for something more in my life and allowing myself to have all that I want out of this journey.

In a short time of this practice, the rewards are great!

I will continue to step out of monotony and make a “bigger” list of desires!