Simplify! - Personal Practice

I am one of the most detail oriented people I know!

I overanalyze everything! 

Considering all this over analysis, I guess you could say I'm a bit wordy and descriptive.  

Who wants to be that kid who is always saying "Could you explain that again so I understand correctly?", while the rest of the class is sighing "Oh, Not again!" 

Not me!  But, I actually am.  Ugh!

For some reason the universe is sending me the message to SIMPLIFY!

I've had multiple interactions within the last week where others are asking me to be less detail oriented.

Amazingly this has not offended me in the least!  Yes, yes, I know I overcomplicate things and overanalyze, and I've been working on it.

Detail is good, but too much can paralyze others.

I recently received a lesson in which the teacher instructed students to listen carefully.  Listen when you receive feedback, listen when you receive that same feedback again, and when you receive it the third time you better better be doing more than listening!

In regard to this lesson, I realized I've been hearing others give feedback on my detail oriented nature and I've been working on it.  But not that hard.

Now it's time to really do something about it!

It's enough that I know the detail, everyone else doesn't have to also.

This doesn't mean that I stop being detail oriented, it just means I stop trying to force it on others.  If detail is that important to me, I can follow through on it for my own sake.  When communicating with others I need to get to the point.  I need to Simplify!

Now with all this said, off I go to dig into the detail of a project!  My practice with this project is to help keep it simple and not overcomplicate it for others.

Wish me luck!  

Simplify! - Yoga Lesson

Ever notice how some things in life can feel overwhelming?

Why do we let that happen?

Possibly we get to caught up in details?

Why not approach everything with a simplistic view?

When we try to make something more than it is, we are only complicating things for ourselves.

Why not simplify as much as possible then add details as necessary?

So how about taking a deep relaxing breath, and then enjoy the moments of your life.

Accepting this moment is the most simple thing you can do!

Simplify!

Imagination - Personal Practice

It's amazing what a week will do to someone's perspective on life!

Last week I was struggling with growth and how painful it is to step out of my comfort zones, and this week I'm so glad I did!

In a week's time I went from being this person who was letting fear get in the way, to a fully recharged person.

How?  I took time to take the steps to make the changes I want for myself.  The steps have challenged my comfort zones and at times have been difficult and painful, but worth it!

I took a chance!  I believed in my dreams and all that I have imagined for my life.

Yes it's been work and will continue to be a lot of hard work, but I want it!  

I believe in myself and all that I have imagined for my life.

I feel excited again and anxious for the next moments and I'm thinking about how I can make a difference.

Right now I'm having a hard time believing that I ever doubted myself.

Thank goodness I believe more in all that I have imagined and want for my life.

Everyone should believe in their dreams.

So I say, let your imagination run wild and then chase it like crazy!

Imagination - Yoga Lesson

So many of us have wonderful ideas that all stem from our imagination.

Ideas come to us and we have a choice.  We can either do something with them or forget about them.

Why is it that we have great imaginative ideas and then do nothing with them?

Is is fear?

Most likely, yes!

Why not put fear aside and let the imagination take over?

Why not take an idea and run with it?

Some of the best ideas others have, most of us find ourselves saying "why didn't I think of that?"

Why not be the person who has the great idea and let's imagination take over?

We all have that capability.  It's just a matter of proactively doing something with it.

So, why not be imaginative!

Growth - Personal Practice

This past week I've found myself in painful situations in which I have felt overwhelmed and a loss of control.

The loss of control has been so strong that anxiety took hold of my heart.

The most painful part about this is that I know what the issues are.

I'm forcing myself to do things I don't want to do.  I'm putting myself in situations I know I will not like.

Why am I doing this?  Because I'm trying to be open to new experiences.  

I'm pushing my comfort zones to see if I might like something I'm trying.

The tough part about this is I know my instincts are telling me, no, this is not for me.  But I'm doing it anyway.

Why do we put ourselves through these experiences I find myself asking.

I think it's because there is hope for change.

This feeling of being a bit lost is good!  It's when significant growth happens in life!

When I reflect back on some of the most trying times in my life, my growth has been substantial and I evolved into a person I like better.

So, I find myself during this time of discomfort and anxiety simply trying to be accepting.  I'm accepting this moment for what it is and doing my best to refrain from trying to force a solution.

I'm trying new things and accepting I might not be my most comfortable and self assured self.  

I'm giving myself an opportunity to grow.

Just like during a yoga class when I hear the teacher cue a posture I dislike.  My mind immediately takes over and tries to talk me out of trying.  My significant growth in body happens when I accept the posture, listen to the cues, and attempt the recommended adjustments.

I'm doing my best to practice growth through discomfort off the mat.  

I choose to let go of force and control, accept the discomfort, and embrace my growth!

Growth - Yoga Lesson

Most of us like to feel in control of everything within and around us.

We like to feel that we have a firm understanding of all that we engage in doing, or have a plan for the future.

When we feel this type of control in our lives, all seems well.

Then something happens to make us feel out of control, or a series of somethings.

We may be challenged to try something new or make a modification to something we have been working on to gain control again.

That loss of control can feel painful and overwhelming.

When finding yourself in this situation, why not accept it?

Why not acknowledge that you do not have control and you are experiencing growth in your life.

You have an opportunity to make new choices and let go of your comfort zones.

Embrace your growth!

Be Yourself - Personal Practice

In life I've found myself putting on personas in order to fit in.  

When acting out a role I felt was expected of me in society...I've felt like an impostor, lost, and a bit scared at times.  It's amazing I felt that way even when many around me thought I was successful!

I believe those feelings are normal when you are not living authentically.

I recently found myself in a situation I've been in before.  It's the situation where I've tried to convince myself I can do or be something I'm not.  

Amazingly each time I've been in a non-authentic situation it doesn't work out.  Ether straight away it doesn't work out because those around me can see clearly what I can not, or eventually I come to my senses and move on.  

There are also those little things you do to sabotage yourself.  It's those little subtle comments or actions that others pick up on or eventually you hear yourself say that speaks the truth loud and clear. 

When something non-authentic to myself doesn't work out, sure I'm disappointed on some level, but there is this opportunity that arises out of the disappointment.  It's the opportunity to be honest with myself and seek out something that is authentic to me.

Yes, this is easier said than done!

It takes self acceptance and hard work to live authentically.

My challenge is to refrain from jumping into the same comfort zones I go to when I feel scared.  By comfort zones I mean the familiar and safe places that seem to always work for me.

To be different I have to do things differently and that's hard!

So off I go to practice being my most authentic self!

Be Yourself - Yoga Lesson

So often in our society many of us want to fit in.

We call that "putting our best selves forward".

However, if you are putting your best self forward are you being honest?  Is it the real you that is being presented to others?

Why not be as honest and authentic as you possibly can be?

When letting go of perceived expectations others have for you and living life as your most authentic self you may find some opportunities lost.

It's normal to feel a little panicked when we miss out on an opportunity.  When this happens take a step back and look around.  

Most likely another opportunity has been created that you would never have noticed if the other opportunity had not been lost.

The big difference is now the new opportunity was presented from being yourself.

So why not be your best "authentic" self?

Be Yourself!

Relationships - Personal Practice

I pride myself in maintaining relationships.  It's a social aspect of my life that I've had for as long as I can remember.

When I'm needed by someone I tend to jump right in and offer my services.

In turn the relationships I put the most energy into are the ones where others offer of themselves to me as well.

Looking back at the start of the strongest relationships in my life, I can honestly say they all started with chance.

By "chance", I mean that we were introduced through mutual friends, we took a class together, we worked together, or sometimes it was a simple smile that opened up dialog.

In dialog we offered each other honest and open communication.  We each saw something in the other that made us want to open ourselves up and share some of our life story.

In opening ourselves up to the other we found ourselves vulnerable.  We hoped the other liked us as much as we liked them.  

What ever circumstance it was that attracted us together, in most cases we found ourselves having similarities that drew us closer together.

So this past week when talking with a friend of mine about a variety of relationships, I was reminded how simple ours had started.  It was a smile and hello while at yoga class.

From that simple smile and hello I've been given the gift of sharing wonderful experiences and I hope many more in the future.

I'm committed to... 

* Continuing to offer smiles and a friendly ear.

* Opening myself up and offering my best to those around me.

* Maintaining relationships.

* Building new relationships!

I'm committed to these, because they enrich my life and make it joyful.

I hope everyone can make a commitment to build relationships!

Relationships - Yoga Lesson

Relationships are what keep many of us going.  

It's the relationships we build with others that bring us joy, or get us through tough times.

Think about the people in your life, how did the relationships with those individuals start?

Maybe it was as simple as someone offering you a smile.

It's amazing how simple some of our relationships start out, but end up having so much meaning in our lives.

When you see a familiar face in a crowd that you know from somewhere else, do you make a point of interacting with that person?  If not, why not?

We all need to just put ourselves out there.  We need to participate in life and hope for solid, long lasting, and positive relationships.

So why not open up?  Why not take a chance on letting someone new into your life?

Why not build a new relationship?

You might just get more from a new relationship than you ever expected! 

Gratefulness - Personal Practice

I've had a few of weeks to feel sorry for myself recently.

I refused to do it!  

Though I had every right to, I wouldn't allow myself the emotion of sadness.

I'm not the type of person who likes to feel sad, so I'll fight that feeling as much as I possibly can.

I busy myself with all sorts of positive activities to keep that emotion from surfacing.  

One positive practice I took up in the past couple of weeks has been to be grateful.

I've seen first hand recently how lucky I am to have my health, as those close to me do not.

I've felt grateful and lucky to have a close group of friends, as I know others who do not invest time in friendships and as such have felt alone.

With all my efforts and all this work to practice a positive attitude and be grateful, it finally happened...

The sadness came to the surface.

The odd thing about the day I allowed myself to be sad was it was right after a full day of fun activities.  I had spent the day being grateful and having a very positive attitude.

Then the next day I woke up with a heavy heart, but couldn't put my finger on as to why.

As the day progressed it became apparent that there was one simple trigger the day before that I had brushed off as nothing, but it was at the heart of my sadness.

So, I allowed myself to cry and cleanse.  I acknowledged my sadness and felt sorry for myself for a few hours.  I also talked to family and friends, and...

You know what?

I Feel Much Better!!!

I believe that practicing gratefulness is essential to a balanced life.  I know it's not always easy, but the practice of gratefulness puts our own lives into perspective.  It allows us to see ourselves clearly and understand our highs and lows.  It helps us to cleanse out the negativity in our lives (even if that cleansing means a good cry) and to move forward with a positive outlook and attitude.

The morning after my "sad day" I got up and listed a few things I was grateful for.  I shared some of my gratitude with others.  

That day turned out to be pretty Great!

We are each allowed some sad days.  It's just after that sad day we need to get up the next day, motivate, and be grateful for who we are!

I'll continue to practice doing just that!

Today I am grateful for...

Gratefulness - Yoga Lesson

Being grateful is something we easily recognize when someone does something nice for us.

What about being grateful each day you wake up?

What would happen if you practiced looking in the mirror each day as you are getting ready and made a mental note of one thing you are grateful for?

Possibly it would start a chain effect in your life.  

Maybe one day in the future you'd start listing more than one thing you are grateful for while you are getting ready for the day.

Then while you are going about your day, maybe eventually you will think to yourself you are grateful for more than you already listed that day.

Then the day comes where you start telling others what you are grateful for and they start to do the same.

Wouldn't that bring you and those around you joy?

Wouldn't that make your life and the lives of those you are close to better?

Why not practice being grateful?

Instinct - Personal Practice

In reflection of this past week I noticed a common theme in my life.  I'm a really hard worker!  

I will make myself crazy working on something that isn't right.

Essentially, I fail to listen to my instincts in negative situations.

The unfortunate thing about this is that I have promised myself multiple times in the past that I would listen to my instincts going forward.

But once in the thick of a situation I find myself second guessing.

I find that I think I can work hard at something and make it work rather than start over.

I feel that I should try harder, which basically means I'm second guessing my gut instinct.

I think that's part of being a hard worker, you want so badly for something that you've participated in to work even though it just doesn't.

The tough part about all this is that you need to untwine yourself from the negative situation.  It's an unfortunate and necessary step that must be taken to get yourself back to a positive place with life.

Possibly that's why I've found myself working hard at something I know is not positive, because I don't want to face the hurt or hurt others.

There's so many reasons why I haven't listened to my gut instinct, but I have to admit the biggest reason is not wanting to face the pain of removing myself from a negative situation.

Separating myself from a negative situation, I have a sense of loss.  Which is remarkable because I'm choosing to live a more positive and happy life by removing myself from the negative.

My practice is to commit to acknowledging that feeling that tells me I need to listen more closely to my subconscious, my instincts.  I need to listen to those thoughts that arise and are accompanied by a tight feeling in my belly and chest.

So, off I go to live life and practice more positive experiences.

I will listen more closely to my instincts!

Instinct - Yoga Lesson

Instinct is something we all have.

The question is, how often do you listen to your instinct?

We are all guilty of ignoring that "gut feeling" that tells us something is or isn't right.  

Why do we do it?

When you feel the emotions of happiness, sadness, fear, or anger you know where the emotion is coming from and it's usually easier to identify with that type of emotion.

But instinct is something we tend to second guess as we tend not to know why we feel we should or should not do something.

Instinct is just something we feel and know without explanation.

Thinking back on your life, do you know of times when you wished you had listened to your instinct?

Try listening to your instinct.  Act responsibly with instinct and see what happens.

You just might live your best life!

Courageous - Personal Practice

I decided a long time ago what I need and want out of life.  

I've been driven and dedicated to my ideal life.  

I found I've been working very hard toward something, thinking that I just needed to keep working harder to obtain my ideal.

I kept focused on my needs and wants.  I ignored my gut when it was telling me something wasn't right because I believed in all the hard work I was doing.

Then I took some time to look up from my hard work and look around me.

Unfortunately, I discovered I wasn't being compensated for all my hard work.

I actually discovered I was being taken advantage of and all that hard work was unappreciated.

Well, this discovery was a bummer!

Upon discovery of this I wondered whether I have the courage to move away from what I had been working on.  Then I wondered whether I have the courage to move forward with my wants and needs after I move on.

I do!  I have the courage it takes to believe in my dreams, ideals, and goals!

However, I'd be lying if I didn't make note that I'm not doing it alone.  

It never ceases to amaze me how giving others are.  

When I've been fearful and feeling alone it's taken a lot of courage to ignore my ego, pick up the phone, call a friend or a family member for help, explain that everything is not as great as I had portrayed it to be, and ask for support.  Upon request, friends and family have always given their love and support.

Thank goodness this is still the case!

I think the reason I receive that love and support is because I do try to live by the golden rule; Do unto others as you'd have done to you.

When living with an open and giving heart, I think it's easier to notice one's ego.  Ego can be pretty powerful, it tries to convince you that you are alone.  

It's taken a lot of practice to refrain from listening to my ego.  Which if allowed to run wild, my ego can be BIG!

I'm glad to see I still have the courage to believe in me and believe in living the best life possible.

Though, I think next time I work with someone toward shared dreams, ideals and goals I'll be a little more patient and expect they too live by the golden rule.

I'm feeling pretty Courageous!

Courageous - Yoga Lesson

Courage in your life will take many forms.

And the funny thing about courage is that many of us tend not to think of ourselves as courageous, but we are!  

Some days just having the drive to get out of bed every morning and face a new day with many unknowns is courageous.

Having that courage to get up and get moving is the first step to a better day.

Sometimes, it's a risk in life that can be daunting.

After all, when taking a risk, we all need a little courage.  

Whether you are taking a small risk in life that makes your nervous or a big risk where you need all the support you can get, taking that first step can take all your courage.

Asking for help when you feel low on courage may give you that jump start to move forward.

When you feel you lack courage, your friends and family will surprise you with the support you need to keep moving.

If you are facing something currently that requires courage, know that you have the fortitude to move forward!  

You Are Courageous!

Bond - Personal Practice

I found myself wondering this past week "what am I doing and why am I in this situation?"

In order to find some clarity I started with the simple question of "am I happy?"

The answer was yes and no. 

Day to day there are annoyances in most relationships I think.  I know I question why I continue to move forward even when I feel disconnected.  Sometimes there is no answer, I just keep moving forward.  

I'm not satisfied with moving forward, just because!  I wanted a purpose!

In an attempt to find an answer I talked to those closest to me about my thoughts, they listened and gave their perspective.

Thank goodness for people who know you and want to see the best for you!  

These people reminded me that I'm not perfect and that everyone has difficult times, but most important was that I don't have to do or be anywhere that is not healthy or positive for me.

So I thought "what have I got to loose, this has to be resolved."

My next step was to ask the other person, "what is the benefit of being in this situation?"

We decided to put together lists of the good, the bad, and the ugly as a place to start our assessment.

Upon review of the lists, we weren't told anything we didn't already know about our situation.

It was the slight difference in how we see the good, the bad, and the ugly that showed us how we keep getting frustated.  

Then the other person reminded me of our initial bond and why they believe we stay united.

Our bond is wanting similar things out of life.  Having similar ideals, core values and goals.

As we talked through the issues I also noticed I was not being honest with what I want and need.  In many cases I expected it just be known by the other person.  

I felt silly asking for what I want, but I did it!

The results of opening up and being honest were, and are, exciting!  I found that the things I want align with our bond.  

Importantly, I also found options for compromise.  I received acceptance for things I'm unwilling to compromise on. 

I feel a renewed sense of purpose with our bond.  I feel a freedom to be myself.  

I'm sure there will be strife along the way as after all we are two different people and perceive life differently.  

As long as happiness outweighs unhappiness the bond will stay strong.

Don't all relationships need a bond?

If so, without a bond and a purpose why bother?

Bond - Yoga Lesson

Sometimes we do not know why we are bound to someone until we question the bond.

Bonds to others come in all forms, but the biggest one is common interests.

Some common interests are healthy and some are not.

When you think of those closest to you, what bonds you to them?

The best bonds in life are the ones that are uplifting, encouraging, loving, and mutually beneficial.

Think about the bonds that compel you toward positive interactions in your life?

If you have negative bonds, why not eliminate these and spend more time on the positive bonds?

Bond positively!

Mood - Personal Practice

My moods have ruled me this past week.

I found myself behaving poorly because I was in a bad mood.

I knew I was in a bad mood so I started talking to myself about my poor attitude.  I thought to myself, gosh I am behaving poorly and this is not the person I want to be.  

But...I kept on with my bad mood.

When I finally snapped out of my bad mood I was right back to my normal happy self, but then a couple days later I was impacted by another person's mood.

I found myself attaching to the other person's poor mood and I even started coming up with my own list of things to be in a bad mood about.  

I took my mood so far as to get stressed and uptight about little things.  I also let my mood take me to the future and all the "got to" and "have to" things I envision for my life and completely stressed myself out.

I've been practicing talking myself into a better mood, but it's been a challenge.

The tough part about this mood of mine is that it's my choice.  I have no one to blame for my mood but me.  I'm the one who chooses to...

* Eat sugar and get anxious and grouchy.

* Hold a grudge when another is extending a truce.

* Attach to another person's negative mood.

* Think negatively instead of positively.

No one does this to me.  I do it to myself.

It's ALL ME!

Moods are one of those things I think we all have to practice in life.  It's not something you master and then you are done with it.  

Unless of course you are a Super Human Being!  Which I usually like to think I am, but obviously am not!

I guess the best thing to do to find or keep a positive mood is to put a smile on my face as much as possible, dance as often as I can, listen to happy music, think about the wonderful people in my life, and reflect back on positive memories. 

Today I choose to be in a good mood!

Mood - Yoga Lesson

Moods are unavoidable and each of us are in a mood right now.

Possibly you started your day off with one mood and then transformed that mood based on the days experiences.

It's amazing how the mood of others can effect us, whether it's an individual or a group of people.

When you enter a space and the people around you are rushed and stressed, it can be nearly impossible to refrain from picking up the moods of the people in that space.

When you go to an event where people are excited and enthusiastic, it is equally difficult to refrain from picking up that mood.

The question we need to ask ourselves, is why would we put ourselves in spaces that are anything but positive?

Mainly a mental space.  Because it all starts with our individual attitudes.

There are times when we go places out of obligation or to complete chores that we don't like and we take a negative attitude and mood with us.

Why not catch yourself when you find yourself approaching something with a negative attitude?  Why not try something different?

Possibly go someplace different to complete the chore and meet new people, or listen to your favorite song and dance before you head out to that obligation you are dreading.

Why not add one more step, place a smile on your face and think of something or someone you like before you enter anywhere you may feel negatively about.

Ideally, we are each in a good mood at all times.  That's just not realistic though.

But, we do have the ability to choose our mood.  

So the next time you find yourself approaching a negative mood, why not try something new...  

Practice being in a positive mood.

Calm - Personal Practice

It's amazing how time flies when you are working on something you feel passion for!

I've been working on a few projects that are dear to my heart for over a year and a half.  In this time I've taken many breaks from the main project, but it's always on my mind.

In recent months I have been digging a little deeper into the project, but here and there I've let myself get overwhelmed by my vision.  It's amazing how I can talk myself into multiple paths with one simple objective.

Then a few weeks back I buckled down and put a plan together.  The great thing about this plan is that I'm holding myself accountable by following the methodology of the project I'm working on.    

I know, based on reflection, that when I get into a project my standard approach is to devote myself completely to the project.  This is good and bad.

It's good that time flies and I feel a sense of accomplishment.

It's bad that I get so involved that I forget to be in the moment.  I start to think of the project in terms of perfection.

If interrupted I get anxious because I want to be working on the project.

If I get too close to a date in my plan that I need to deliver on, I feel pressure.

My world starts to get a bit chaotic as I push toward the future.

While reflecting I found myself thinking back to something I use to say years ago "patience is a virtue, of which I have none".  I use to think that was funny to say.  Now, I don't think it's so funny.  

Now when I catch myself thinking of that old saying, I'll practice breathing.  

I'll remind myself that the joy of life and of the project is in each moment.  I'll tell myself I can't predict exactly how things will turn out.  

If my project goes to plan it will evolve and get better and better over time, but I can't do it all on my own and I won't be perfect.

So I pat myself on my back for being self aware, but realize I still have a lot of practice to do.

I need to practice:

* Taking breaks and looking around me

* Remembering that nothing is perfect, least of all me.

* Breathing and staying calm 

I know I should be patient and calm as I practice.

But, can I be?

Back to practice to see!

Calm - Yoga Lesson

Each of us has had moments were we struggle to be calm.

At times you may feel pressure to correct something or to complete something ahead of schedule.

In these moments it's easy to think of only the past or the future.

When this is happening you may find yourself holding your breath and thinking you need to hurry up and fix your mistake or you need to be an overachiever and get further ahead.

Possibly you feel the world is spinning out of control and you are in complete chaos.  Maybe you start to feel there's no time to do everything you need to do.

When you find yourself feeling this way, why not ask yourself if you can be calm?

Why not implement a practice of noticing when you are feeling pressure and feeling anxious?

Then ask yourself if you can practice breathing deeply and find your calm center.

As you practice your breath, look up from what you are doing and observe what is around you.

Then, as you work to correct the past or work to get ahead, remind yourself the importance of the moment you are in, the joy of having the moment and being patient with it.

Practice your calm.

Reflection - Personal Practice

I found myself being irritated by small things this past week.  

Nothing significant or noteworthy especially.  It's just the day to day little things that get to me in life, but I move on after deciding that it's not really that big a deal to complain about because I'm sure the person irritating me isn't intentionally doing so.

The irony in this was that I was challenged for small irritating things I do.  

Now, this challenge visibly irritated me.

I countered the challenge by saying to the person "just let it go, be a happy person", and then remained quite the rest of the evening.

But then the next morning, I started to reflect on my own long list of irritants with this person.

I noticed that when I'm irritated with the small things in life I don't tell people I'm irritated.  I will pick up someone else's mess and grip about it to myself, but I soon forget about it and move onto the next thing on my task list.  All these small things seem, well, small.  That is until I feel attacked by the person regarding a small thing they are irritated with me about.

The troublesome thing about my behavior is that I get defensive, but I do so in my own mind.  The other person has no idea that I've decided I don't have to put up with such nonsense.  

The self talk goes something like: Look at all that I have done for this person and they don't even appreciate it, but they think it's okay to nag me about small things they want me to do.  What about what I want?!  How can they not notice all the small things I do for them?  Don't they know I don't want to do these things?  I do them to be nice!

I decided this self talk was destructive and took time to reflected on my past irritants with others.  I noticed the a trend...

I don't talk about the small things.

I start to feel justified in my dismissing the other's needs because I'm not getting what I need.

I talk myself into a life where I don't need anyone else...I'll just do everything myself.

In this reflection I noticed a big problem with the small things in my life.  I don't talk about them and I dwell on them with a negative attitude when it suits me.

So, it's my choice.  I can practice being more direct and honest about these small things in little doses or I can blow them out of proportion and get defensive when someone challenges me on something small.

Ah...the things you learn about yourself while in reflection.

Reflection - Yoga Lesson

Reflection can have positive and negative attributes. 

Some reasons we may reflect are to dwell on something or to return to a happy moment.

Why not practice reflection to learn something about yourself, to gain an understanding?

If you are dwelling, ask yourself why?  

If you are returning to a happy moment, why is the moment you are in not sufficient?

Take notice when you are reflecting and challenge yourself and learn something about yourself.

Reflection is what you make of it.

Sympathy - Personal Practice

Sympathy is something I expect.  

I am the type of person who expects sympathy when I feel sad or I'm hurt.

I had a situation this week that is challenging how I look at sympathy.

Whenever I have a visit with very good friends of mine who live far away I have two very strong emotions.

The first is pure excitement leading up to the day of my or their arrival and that feeling lasts the whole time we are visiting.

The second is complete and utter sadness the moment I or they leave.

In the past I have received complete sympathy from those around me when my friends departed.  I've received hugs or a gentle touch.  I've even received peep talks in which I was challenged to reflect upon the good times shared instead of my friends departure.  This instruction helped and I still use it to cheer myself up to this day.

Recently however I came across a situation in which I was feeling sad and was not offered sympathy.  

This threw me for a loop!  

I couldn't believe that I was not being offered sympathy!

After some time to think about this "lack of sympathy" and gripe about it with others, I calmed down.

Once calm I remembered that the person who did not give sympathy doesn't like it when I'm overly sympathetic.  Which I normally am.

An offer of a simple "that's too bad" or complete silence is preferred.  If I bring up the sadness or hurt at a later time to that person they get agitated and politely ask me to "drop it".

I don't know if I'll ever get use to people feeling differently than I do, and that doesn't apply to only sympathy.

I can remember a situation in which a friend was offended by the offer of sympathy extended by another.  The friend felt it wasn't sincere.  At the time, I agreed.

Now, I might challenge that friend by saying to them that possibly the other person is doing the best they can based on their perspective of sympathy.

My practice is to allow others to feel as they do, but ask others to respect how I feel.  

Some people I may have to flat out ask for a hug verses expect it.

That seems to be a common theme I come back to, "My Expectations".

Expectations aside, I will practice to ask for what I need.  

I will also continue to offer sympathy as that is part of who I am and how I show I care when someone is sad or hurt.  

Sympathy - Yoga Lesson

We all need sympathy at times.

Maybe you feel you don't need sympathy. 

Maybe it makes you uncomfortable to receive sympathy and you have a hard time offering it to others.

Maybe you are the type of person who can feel the emotions of others and offer sympathy when you can.

Challenge yourself with regard to sympathy.

We all offer and receive sympathy differently.

The challenge is in communicating to someone that you have the best intentions, or that you have needs they may not have.

It's an exercise in allowing yourself and others to feel as you do.  

Be sympathetic.

Justification - Personal Practice

I've come across some tough situations lately and I've felt a bit confused on what is best for me.

In these tough situations my wants have been challenged.

I find myself debating the pro's and con's of my behavior and why it's best if I do what I want.

How do I know I've been doing this?

I'm creating drama!

My ego is telling me it's okay to behave a certain way or do things that I want to do.  If my ethics and morals are challenged I start to get dramatic.  

I've even gone so far as to feel sorry for myself and find a way to blame someone else for how I have been feeling.

Blaming someone else is the last straw for me!  

In my practice of self awareness and self responsibility I know that self pity and finding fault in someone else is a sign that I need to challenge myself.  I also need to reflect upon challenges that have been given to me recently that are causing my ego to get all prideful.

In reflection, I'm what some people would coin as "Too close to the fire".  I'm deep in my thoughts and conniving to get my way.  

I'm simply finding a way to justify my thoughts and behavior.

This is unacceptable!

This is not practicing self awareness.  What it is, is practicing getting what I want.  Being manipulative. 

The worst part about it is I'm manipulating myself.  I'm lying to myself.

If this is what a practice of justification will bring me, I don't want a part of it.

All this drama is tiresome.

The best part of this lesson, I've been practicing enough to realize I needed to challenge and question myself when my gut is telling me that my behavior is self destructive.

I voiced some of my concerns about my thoughts to those closest to me and I was met with challenge.  No black or white opinions were given to me by the people in my life.  They gave me new ways to look at my concerns.  Their patience and thoughtfulness made the difference.

As I practice it appears justification suits the person doing the justifying.  

So in reflection on justification, I think I better be careful when I catch myself justifying!